That Special Someone

Everyone (or at least me and my friends) would like to find their special SOMEONE .. someday. Is it really that hard? Or are we over-picky?

I've never really had a girlfriend since the day I was borned. My reason for not having one is because I'm looking for that special person in my life. To have and to hold, to settle down and grow old. Now it seems, it's somewhat impossible..

Friends who are nice will say that I'm being romantic, but others will just say that I have too high a standard to begin with. But is it really so? When I look at someone, I admit I'll scrutinised them and sometimes comment on them. And that shouldn't be confused with my expectations in my future partner. Cos I asked for the very minimum if people were to ask me what do I look for in a girlfriend.. appearance: so long as she looks pleasant to me, build: slim, character: independent. Too much? Or too little?

Back to the topic... how do we know if the person you're dating/ going to date is the special someone in your life? Truth is, no one knows for sure. He/she may have set your heart ablaze.. or your adrenaline pumping .. but that's only the chemistry part. What about the physical and the psychological part? I think we can use an equation like this:

Special Someone = Chemistry x Physical x Psychological(EQ & IQ)

Reason being: when we first meet someone, we're attracted physically (appearance) and then comes chemistry. When the physical part die down, the psychological part will then take over. That's what many of the married couples are facing nowadays, they can't switch from the physical part to the psychological side and everything starts to crumble once they're into 5-10 years of their marriage or some even later.

So you see, having sex without love is purely physical. Making love satisfy not only the physical part, but also the psychologically as well. (to be continued....)

Being Twenty Something..

They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis". It is
when you stop going along with the crowd and
start realising that there are many things about
yourself that you didn't know and may not like.
You start feeling insecure and wonder where you
will be in a year or two, but then get scared
because you barely know where you are now.


You start realising that people are selfish and
that, maybe, those friends that you thought you
were so close to aren't exactly the greatest
people you have ever met, and the people you have
lost touch with are some of the most important
ones. What you don't recognise is that they are
realising that too, and aren't really cold,
catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as
confused as you.


You look at your job...and it is not even close
to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe
you are looking for a job and realising that you
are going to have to start at the bottom and that
scares you. Would you dare to take the risk?


Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what
others are doing and find yourself judging more
than usual because suddenly you realise that you
have certain boundaries in your life and are
constantly adding things to your list of what is
acceptable and what isn't.


One minute, you are insecure and then the next,
you're not. You laugh and cry with the greatest force
of your life. You feel alone and scared and
confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you
try and cling on to the past with dear life, but
soon realise that the past is drifting further
and further away, and there is nothing to do but
stay where you are or move forward.


You get your heart broken and wonder how someone
you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lay
in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone
decent enough that you want to get to know better.
High expectations? Certainly not...


Or maybe you love someone but love someone else
too and cannot figure out why you are doing this
because you know that you aren't a bad person.


One nightstands and random hook ups start to look
cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot
starts to look pathetic. You go through the same
emotions and questions over and over, and talk
with your friends about the same topics because
you cannot seem to make a decision.


You worry about loans, money, the future and
making a life for yourself...and while winning
the race would be great, right now you'd just
like to be a contender!


What you may not realise is that everyone reading
this relates to it. We are in our best of times and
our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to
figure this whole thing out.

Test of the day

You are Cigarettes. Easy to get, nasty to smoke,
addictive as hell and you kill 400,000 people a
year. Congratulations.


What Drug Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

For Once In My Life

This sucks... I think I'm really down on my luck? Or is it simply I'm not making enough effort? My job sucks, my job hunt sucks, my life sucks!

Went for my only job interview last thursday and what happened? I screw up... yes.. totally screwed.
I wasn't the least bit prepared and when the interviewer asked me questions.. I simply act as though I know but couldn't recall and then after giving it some "thoughts", I just told him that I don't know. How great~ ;(
Though he mentioned that he's only helping the manager to assess the candidates' standard and will not be a deciding factor, I really don't think my chances are high at all.. bye to my 2nd interview!!

My mood has been very unstable these days.. don't know why. I flare up at the smallest of things and get easily irritated. Have no mood to work, feel like sleeping at home everyday.. doing nothing.. this is bad. Wonder if anyone has a solution or a miracle cure? Actually I know there is, just give me more money and flexible working hours.. too much to ask for?

be back later...


Currently listening to: Noon - Better than anything (a very nice jazz album)